When I was 50, I took a solo trip without family; Refuse to feel guilty

As a mom of three teenagers, most of my days revolve around carpooling, preparing meals, and managing a busy family schedule.

So when I came across a cruise scheduled for my 50th birthday – one that would take me through Norway, a country that has long been on my travel list – my instinct was to find a way to take the whole family with me.

The logistics, however, seemed impossible. My middle child worked as a camp counselor in the mountains near Yosemite all summer, my husband used his limited vacation time to visit family on the East Coast, and my other two children had their own obligations.

For a while, I considered abandoning the trip altogether. Instead, I decided to go alone.

Solo travel – and travel in general – hasn’t been a big part of my life since having kids

When I told my family I would be leaving without them, they were surprised.

In my family, trips are generally more low-key: a short weekend in Tahoe, camping at a nearby state park. Quick trips are easier to fit into my teenagers’ schedules.

We usually save major holidays for milestone events, like when our extended family traveled to Puerto Vallarta a few years ago to celebrate my parents’ 50th wedding anniversary.

At first, booking a trip alone seemed uncomfortable, but I’ve wanted to visit Norway since I was in sixth grade. This cruise would be an easy way to do that – and, while I was there, I decided to spend a few days alone in Amsterdam before boarding the ship.

I have to travel as myself, not as “mom”

After booking my flight to Amsterdam, I decided to lean on freedom. I signed up for a food tour and canal cruise that I knew I would enjoy. In the Netherlands, I ate whenever I wanted, enjoyed prosecco in canalside cafes, and walked miles every day.

Once I boarded the cruise, I booked the excursions I liked, spending the day cruising the Skjolden Fjords on a RIB inflatable boat. I booked a floating sauna in the small town of Leirvik, where I invited strangers-turned-friends to join me in an invigorating cold bath.

Each day upon returning to the ship, I enjoyed an hour in the wonderfully quiet, child-free hydrotherapy lounge. It was the perfect time to completely relax, without the weight of all the responsibilities I was used to at home.

Under the jets of the waterfall, my muscles relaxed, my worries faded away and I was truly myself.

I realized it was the best birthday present I could have given myself

The trip seemed daring, maybe even selfish at first, but once the two weeks were over, I realized it was exactly what I needed. It reminded me that I am not only a mother and a wife, but also a person with her own dreams.

When I got home, I took more than just photos of fjords and bags of Scandinavian candy. I came back with a message for my children: trying new and exciting things has no expiration date.

For me, turning 50 wasn’t about slowing down. It was about giving myself permission to live more boldly and showing my children that they can too.