I grew up with early social media and I’m still learning to disconnect

As a Gen-Zer, I grew up in the early stages of social media. I looked through the trendsI posted silly music videos with my sister on Vine (before TikTok) and, of course, I took plenty of duck-faced selfies and dog-ear filtered photos on Snapchat.

I’ve tried so hard to adapt to the aesthetic of white borders around photos, collages and throwback Thursdays. I took mirror selfies of my #OOTD before school and took artistic photos of my mocha latte at the popular coffee shop. My VSCO app was always open, adding heavy filters and removing imperfections that I was focusing on and only I noticed.

Now that I’m grown up, I’m pruning myself time away from social media doing things I love.

I was obsessed with my appearance on screen

In high school, I was obsessed with my number of followerslike many of my peers. The likes, comments and shares occupied my mind.

If a post didn’t get a like within two minutes, I deleted it and tried again, often asking my friends to like and comment just to keep up with appearances. When I lost a follower, I would look at an app to see who it was. I was constantly refreshing, hoping to get over 100 likes in an hour.

I drove myself crazy.

My teenager, like many others, was constantly on apps. Who hangs out with who? What house have I not been invited to? Where’s the big party after prom?

It’s time for sad nights and the pressure to appear a certain way on social media for intangible likes.

Social media pressure continues into adulthood

Today, these same pressures continue to manifest in various ways as social media evolves and expands daily. Now, instead of focusing on likes, I find myself stuck in endless scrolling: seeing people my age moving out of their parents’ house, get engagedLand dream jobs or travel to extravagant locations and resorts.

This creates comparison and doubt about what I’m doing wrong, when the answer is nothing, I’m on my own path. However, social media makes it easy for me to compare myself and feel like I’m falling behind.

I try to set limits on my social media use

As social media has changed over the years and apps try to lure us in for longer and longer, I have to change too. I learned to try to resist the pressures created by these apps. During the week, I spend time away from the screen, focusing on the things that make me feel good about myself.

After work, I take time to attend my favorite group exercise classes at the gym, followed by a walk in the park, where I enjoy the natural surroundings. I only use my phone for music, not for scrolling while walking.

I set aside time to write by putting my phone away to eliminate any outside noise. I turn off all notifications, enjoying the time away from pings.

When I’m out with family and friends, instead of constantly using my phone to create an Instagram story, I try to stay present, engage in meaningful conversations, and create memories that will last a lifetime, rather than something a random person can click on for a millisecond.

I’m not perfect

Instead of having the mindset of proving my worth to a group of followers, I decided to post what I want to post, and it makes me feel good.

Now, I like to post in a way that helps me connect more with people in my career field: I seek to engage in meaningful conversations instead of just scrolling or chasing influence. I have no hesitation in posting something that I am proud of accomplishing and I disregard the opinions of others.

Delving into social media can be a challenge, especially since my full-time job is as a social media and marketing manager. It’s easy to start getting ahead of yourself and start comparing yourself to others.

I often find myself trapped and start scrolling through disaster. And believe me, I always love posting a pretty sunset or my favorite pasta dish at a restaurant. However, maintaining a mix of positive mindset and simple practices to cut through the noise helps prove that my self-worth is not defined by likes and follows.